Come Back As A Flower

Come Back As A Flower
Mixed Media Self-Portrait (Sculpted clay mask, fabric & digital illustration)

My Journey ~ Part #3 ~ I Am Changing!

CHANGING:  The blessing of another Lucy Morgan Scholarship in 2010, made it clear to me that I was standing on the prayers of Miss Lucy.  I was confirmed into the Episcopal faith at St. John’s in Sylvia – the home church of Miss Lucy and Father Morgan.  The Bishop told me that an ordinary person could achieve extraordinary things with God’s help.  I am the most ordinary of people – a mixed blood Indian girl of color from Eastern North Carolina.  Learning printing on clay with Paul Wandless and Kathy King was a big piece of my creative puzzle because of my graphics background.  I’m walking out the process of changing from the inside out.

My Journey ~ Part #2 ~ New Day

I was still swimming in the ocean of uncertainty when I arrived at Penland in 2009.  Once again I was blessed with a work-study scholarship.  Renewed with the knowledge that the weight of the pain of the circumstances of my life was lifted, my transformation took place in my hands.  I discovered relief tile making with Angelica Pozo, and my hands learned a new way of making that spoke to my soul.  I left Penland after Auction, walking on dry land – no longer swimming in the brokenness of the Blues.  I was changed from the inside out.  I let go fear and started to live in the moment of greatness for my life.  I discovered it’s not about finding myself.  It’s about walking out God’s purpose for my life.  Yes, I’m broken with no more strength to fight.  I’ve failed time and time again, and every one of the choices I made has led to regret.   But, it’s in my brokenness that I’m “justified by grace,” and with that grace each and every moment is a NEW DAY!

My Journey ~ Part #1 ~ I Look 2 U

In 2008, I applied as a scholarship student to Penland School of Crafts during one of the darkest hours of my life.  I received the blessing of a Lucy Morgan Scholarship, and experienced the beginning of a transformation in my art and in my life.  Penland became the light to illuminate my way out of the pain of humiliation, rejection, being diminished and stripped of dignity in a toxic learning environment.  It was a struggle to get to Penland that summer.  I felt as if I was drowning in an ocean of pain, with a weighted rope around my ankle pulling me down into the melancholy blues.  The transforming light of Penland taught me that I doubted my own strength.  I untangled the rope of self-doubt, anger and fear around my ankle, swam up to the light of day and exhaled.  I am helpless and broken and with each and every breath “I Look 2 You”! .... the journey continues ...